Well, welcome to the weekly Guido's PMQs Live - Highlights
Goodbye Darling Edition
What's For Lunch Carlos?
Carlos MIA
Theresa May Spacesuit Watch
.243 Win: May's the Urban Spacebird again...
BristolDave: Hooray, the Helmetless Astronaut is back!
Steve Expat: Theresa May in the spacesuit again...
Dick Scratcher: And so, Theresa May’s back, from outer space. I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face. I should have changed my stupid lock. I should have made you leave your key. If I had known for just one second. You'd be back to bother me…etc.
coco the conspirator: is teresa wearing an action man diving suit?
.243 Win: Dick : "She's the Urban Spacebird baby, but here's the twist : She don't exist". Apologies to the Bonzo Dog band...
The IMF is coming: Theresa off diving later
@paulwaugh: Theresa May laughing so much at GB that her star trek outfit looked like it was going to beam itself up
Tory Tittle Tattler: how much longer are we going to have to wait before theresa may gets rid of that awful star trek jacket!
@niallpaterson: Tory frontbench sitting in silence. Probably as dumb-struck as i am by Theresa May's jacket.
Hain Pantone Watch
Dick Scratcher: Hain Pantone Reference : 811 (neon pumpkin)
Dodgy Tie of the Week
BristolDave: God almighty, where did that tie come from?
Bristol Dave : The 70's
Star Trek Watch
.243 Win: Malik being this weeks token Ferrangi.
Claw Watch
.243 Win: The CLAW !!!!
Beware of Geeks: Claw watch!
Labour Parody of the Week
Geraldine Dreadful MP: This budget will hopefully reinstate the milk taken away from our kids by the hated Margaret Thatcher
Best Line of the Week
hugh: i got a taxi back from the pub last night - 5 grand!
Highlights
@torybear: Nice taxpayer funded helicopter for Darling's wake
Roger Thornhill: A Flatulence Fart For All
Dick Scratcher: Stephen Byers latest: I had that Rosie Winterton in the back of my cab last week. It was a threesome with John Prescott.
.243 Win: Christ on a bike. Smiffy can always find work as the model for the next "Chucky" movie.
Beware of Geeks: Hang on a minute, he's now saying it has gone up again? Have I had a Flash Forward?
Dick Scratcher: Mountford : I wouldn't touch her with yours
BristolDave: Look at Brown's hand waving! Ooh Ducky!
Dick Scratcher: Sarah Brown getting bullying lessons from Naomi Campbell
RantinRab: He sent our gold in a big pre paid envelope
Urban Tory: I must say, I am going to miss those eyebrows from the front bench
BristolDave: Urban Tory: You may not have to miss them, I'm sure he'll rent them out to someone else
Tom FD: he likes to present himself as Mister Trans-pear-ant
Steve Expat: nokias doing their pre-flight checks already
Tom FD: I had that Stephen Byers in my cab and he was driving it
BristolDave: I was in a cab and it was Stephen Byers
Roger Thornhill: Yvette has the smallest head in the HoC
.243 Win: Kemp : Frankinstein had a bad day with that one...
Spank Sinatra: It's Mr Potato Head
@niallpaterson: Brown clearly not happy today. Arms crossed when listening to Cameron, and what my gran would call "a face like fizz"
John Ward: Ranks, certainly. There's a rank stench, and Byers is in a taxi-rank.
BristolDave: "Let me thank my honourable friend for that planted question"
Another Engineer: Zero emissions? Where the hell does the electricity come from you muppet?
Bill Quango mp: While Prescott lives we will never get zero emissions.
RantinRab: It's to be called the Nissan Tw@t.
mort: gawd gorgon is boiling, hope his head explodes
spotty: the new 'leaf 'car. A free calendar to check your acceleration
Geraldine Dreadful MP: I can't get a taxi anywhere now Byers raised the going rate to five grand.
Old Holborn: the most corrupt parliament in living memory
Vladikavkaz: I burnt my toast this morning, Ashcrofts fault
Taxi Driver for hire: £5k a day
Rog: Who IS that swarthy homunculus a few seats to Brown's left? Some sort of ethnic Oompah Loompah?
Geraldine Dreadful MP: I think John Bercow is fabulous. But then I thought he was a janitor.
Beware of Geeks: Brown is comparing New York Apples with English pears
Hugh Jardon: nodding her head like a £100.00 /hr prozzy
Old Holborn: Labour wants to touch your children
Nick2: Sure Start? Didn't Smackney Council close one as it was 'too middle class'?
.243 Win: Someone tell Loch Ness it's monster is missing..
Roger Thornhill: Just because Socialism is legal, does not mean it is safe
Legally Retarded: I'm surprised Bell doesn't just run down and suck him off...
@torybear: Gordon events new drug "methoderdrown"
Roger Thornhill: Gordon puts the N in Cuts.
dr. sipp: i never got my free plastic toy in my sugar puffs cereal ---im blaming ashcroft
Beware of Geeks: Question to the Prime Minister: "What is the square root of 16,433?" Answer from the Prime Mentalist: "Lord Ashcroft"
Vladikavkaz: the square root of 16433 was only 128 in 1997, but we have increased this by 50% in real terms to 192.
Dick Robinson: lord ashcroft production has risen by 20%
Bill Quango mp: Breaking News ***Chancellor takes two bottles of scotch to the Budget**** Means spirits going up or he needs a lot of false courage
Posts
MIA? Me? No, was just rather, ahem, busy. If you get what I mean.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness for that Carlos! Hopefully see you next week then for the penultimate PMQs before the election!
ReplyDelete