Guido's PMQs Live - Highlights

Missed all the banter on Guido's Live PMQs? Can't be arsed to trawl through pages of the windowlicking scribblings of the demented? Want to see the highlights in one easy to digest posting?


Well, welcome to the weekly Guido's PMQs Live - Highlights

Gordon Ducks Again version



What's for lunch, Carlos?

Carlos: Not so sure, BoG. Pondering a pizza, but as yet nothing has prompted me...
.243 Win: Carlos : Steak baguette.
Carlos: Very good! But I want some Bollinger now!



Hain Pantone Watch

MIA



Theresa May Astronaut Watch

Beware of Geeks: Theresa May wearing the astronaut suit again
Old Holborn: ground control to major tom
The IMF is coming: Theresa going diving
startledcod: Who has nicked Theresa May's space helmet?
Beware of Geeks: Theresa can borrow my helmet
Roger Thornhill: Geeks - who says you would get it back?
Beware of Geeks: Roger - I've scraped too many barrels to care! :)



Penguins and Dog Watch


Armchair Fred: Can she work Ashcroft into tthe dogs debate?
Carlos: Dogs can't look up. Or is that penguins.
.243 Win: Carlos : Never seen a dog look up a penguin.
John Ward: I like that idea, a penguin would be nice, but would need a box in front of the Despatch Box to be visible.
John Ward: An emperor penguin would be better than Fuhrer Brown...
Carlos: John, a Gentoo Penguin turd woudl be better than Brown.
Grapefruit bowls: Penguins knock their friends into the water to check for seals



Odd Comment of the Week



Grapefruit bowls: Once bitten by a snake, a dog will fear sausages.



Highlights


Billy Blofeld: Wimmin's manufacturing is up......... that Rabbit Dildo factory has been going like the clappers

Carlos: Scrolling banner should read "Gordon Brown is a coward and is hiding under his desk"
Ollie Cromwell: I have a feeling he is about to whoop the rear of the year
Harpic Watch: Beast of Bolsover has same jacket on for 20 years
Guido Fawkes: well done Harman, got Hague's job right this time
Ghost of Greg Stone: Get your choppers out
Labour bankrupted the UK: Gordon Brown's brains has already been disolved a long time ago.
Carlos: Please can I punch Ainsworth now?
Should_Be_Working: Harriet doesn't understand bonds, currency and stuff - she's a bird
Old Holborn: @sally_bercow, fuck off you clapped out spunkbucket
Nick2: INTEGRITY? HARMAN? Frank Field described her as a fucking liar to her face!
Should_Be_Working: "Mislead" - shouldn't that be Ms Led from a proud feminist like Harperson?
John Ward: Anagram of Jack Dromey-Harman is "Ah, my Joker card man"
Jack Dromey: Fookin go girl. That's my misses, that is
Ollie Cromwell: Brown paper envelopes being passed around
Harpic Watch: Hague nicked one from Guido about Brown weakness
Sally Bercow: Who fancies a quick fuck?
Beware of Geeks: @ Sally Bercow - is there a queue as before?
Sally Bercow: No queue. get it while it's hot
Yiddo from the Lane: "Harriet Harman is Nicola Murray" - funniest comment so far IMO
Spank Sinatra: Put a bag on her head someone please..
Old Holborn: she cut her hair with a knife and fork
Roger Thornhill: Harriet Harman would fail the Turing Test
JULIAN BRAY NAE NOKIA!: UGLY FACE OF SECRETS
Carlos: Turing = Genius. Harman = Failure.
Roger Thornhill: The only Tax I want to see are the ones nailed into Harman's eyes
Carlos: Bradshaw nodding about marriage? Hmmmm.
Spank Sinatra: More irritable vowel syndrome
.243 Win: Fuck, run, IT's the Mekon.
Old Holborn: did he get dressed in the dark?
WoaR: Jacqui Dromey is being gender re-assigned to comply with the shortlist.
Geordie Girl: Bradshaw looks like a grinning deaths head.
Spank Sinatra: Straw has got his usual pube stuck down his throat I see
Harpic Watch: Feckin Flopsy Bradshaw - what a cnut!
The IMF is coming: Someone lost their curtains?
John Ward: Wearing upholstery now on the Labour backbenches!
Beware of Geeks: It was an Ashcroft plant strategy that went horribly, and more importantly, visibly wrong 
Bill Quango MP: And apologise for that gawd awful face

Dick the Prick: Mr Spunker
Dick the Prick: Ben Bradshaw not gonna be able to spunk for weeks he's creamed so much
JULIAN BRAY NAE NOKIA!: dromey derry kamel shite
Liz: Oh bless. She has a hanky up her sleeve, like my grandma.
Roger Thornhill: National Institute for Continuing Excrement
A Firm Pair Of Breasts: Bust!