Guido's PMQs LiveChat: Keep It Vague Edition

Thanks to Guido for hosting today's LiveChat where the windowlickers gather for Wednesday's PMQs.

Peter Bone got the funniest line in with a great reply from Cam saying: "I wish my wife was as easily pleased!"

#carloslunch

Carlos: What's should I have for pudding?

Carlos: Should I use Fairy or Tesco washing up liquid?

John M Ward: Bottle Fairy, Carlos. Oh no, that's a Japanese anime...


#tiewatch

Dick Scratcher: Old school tie behind - or is it egg?


#hainpantone

Dick Scratcher: Hain Pantone Reference : 815B (Andre’s six pack)


#celebwatch

Dick Scratcher: CELEB WATCH: Stuart Golabek (Inverness Caledonian Thistle defender) in public gallery

Dick Scratcher: CELEB WATCH: Stuart Golabek (Inverness Caledonian Thistle defender) in public gallery


#latest

Dick Scratcher: LATEST: Al Megrahi’s cactus has just died.

Dick Scratcher: LATEST: Al Megrahi’s watch has just died.


#bestpun

John M Ward: Y'know: if Guido collapsed in the gutter on the way back from the pub', would he become one of those fawkes in the road?


#bestline

Billy Bowden: If you saw Guido at the beach you would have to start throwing buckets of water over him.


#highlights

Steve Miliband: David Cameron’s favourite cigarettes are Silk Savings

Steve Miliband: Hague would like 20 Embassies

Steve Miliband: Osborne prefers Benson and Hedgefunds

Dorian Smith: HH looking perky, is it the love beads?

John M Ward: "Poleeth othitherth ??

obangobang: We've lost 12,000 police officers in Libya? F*** me, that was careless.

Tuscan Tony: Two Theresa's, One Cup.

John M Ward: From MacNeil to Neil Carmichael

John M Ward: ...and in a while back to Andrew Neil!

Ed But Look Balls: dildo goggins!

Dick Scratcher: Del Piero: There are a quarter of a million Italians in Britain. And they’ll be made to suffer. Every restaurant, café, ice-cream parlour, gambling den and nightclub in London, Liverpool and Glasgow, will be smashed. Mr Bridger will drive them into the sea.

John M Ward: Was that Caroline Flint's other hair?

Beware of Geeks: Did she just say "Bull****!"?

Tuscan Tony: Gloria de Bonehead.

MrHarryCole: Cracking question from the Bonester

Ed But Look Balls: Bone Alone!

paulwaugh: Brilliantly deft reply from PM to Peter Bone:"I wish my wife was as easy to please"

Steve Miliband: I bet Ed wishes his 'life partner' was easy to please

Tuscan Tony: Michael W, you are a pile of erectile tissue and I claim my offshore trust.

Tuscan Tony: Why is Vince Cable wearing an opium poppy?

Dick the Prick: Sweaty, matted, greasy minge

Tuscan Tony: Don't knock it til you've tried it DtP

Steve Miliband: Al Mehgrahi's great granny's birthday today

Tuscan Tony: Powerful thighs, that Bagshawe woman.

Rog: Ken Clarke going for the partially deflated rubber dinghy look I think.

Dick Scratcher: I’d like to communicate Caroline Flint’s brains out, but what happened to that other great Liebour communicator Tony McNumpty? Anyone seen him?

Tuscan Tony: fist past the paws - Winnie the Pooh porno?

Steve Miliband: Alan titmarsh has fewer plants

Dick Scratcher: He should give Ffion a good ff***ing

John M Ward: Y'know: if Guido collapsed in the gutter on the way back from the pub', would he become one of those fawkes in the road?

John M Ward: Y'know: if Guido collapsed in the gutter on the way back from the pub', would he become one of those fawkes in the road?

Billy Bowden: If you saw Guido at the beach you would have to start throwing buckets of water over him.