Wednesday 18 May 2011

Guido's PMQs Live Highlights: “Classic Rape” Edition

Thanks to Guido once again for hosting today's LiveChat where the windowlickers gather for Wednesday's PMQs.

Slight improvement this time with RedEd taking advantage of Clarke's rape gaffe earlier and a rare appearance by the Beast of Bolsover.


#safariwatch

obangobang: Is that a giraffe next to Milibad?

Steve Miliband: Is that a Giraffe or Harman

13eastie: Nice to see Harman's giraffe outfit has been retained.

Dick Scratcher: Can we burn that frigging giraffe suit on 5th November?


#hainpantone

Dick Scratcher: Hain Pantone Reference : 810F (Satsuma Ego)


#tiewatch

Billy Blofeld: Dave and George have decided to be Tories today........ hence the blue ties.....


#labourparody

THE PARTY OPPOSITE: DENNIS SKINNER IS MY MAN


#tuscantonyslingualschool

Dorian Smith: Tráthnóna maith, iad siúd a lick na fuinneoga


#latest

Dick Scratcher: LATEST: Al Megrahi’s Prius has just died.


#bestpun

genghiz the khan: tyrie and unemotional


#bestline

Duckhouse Rools - Julian: Good morning Guido good about the english speaking requirement - cast of eastenders to be deported then


#highlights

Dick the Prick: Afternoon sex pests

genghiz the khan: wape, pillage, dwink,

Beware of Geeks: "Welease Woderwick! He's a wapist!"

Moniker: Balls and rape - interesting combo


will: god the labour front bench look like they have been sucking lemons

Tuscan Tony: Slightly unhappy use of the words "bonkers" by Ed when talking about rape.

Julian Duckhouse Rools - Julian: From Red to dead....in 30 mins....

Billy Blofeld: I'd like to see their balls smashed between bricks........ go on Dave you know you want to say that....

Tuscan Tony: Gotta watch your fingers if you do that Billy

Dick Scratcher: Hyman = bit of a c***

Dick Scratcher: Laws going down....every night

Spank Sinatra: Shares for chavs - wonderful

Tuscan Tony: Rachel reeves: today's overmotivated loon.

Tuscan Tony: Is Ken Clarke taking some points for Huhne?

MrHarryCole: RT @Lefty_Lisa: Ken Clarke will be on the Vanessa show later. Its where Tories go to fire the final bullet into their careers.

Spank Sinatra: Big breaths and she's only thixteen

M. Crescent: Caroline Norks looking luscious today

Tuscan Tony: Caroline N looks like she's been at the wallpaper bucket again this morning.

Tuscan Tony: John Robertson: a tethered weather balloon of an MP

Beware of Geeks: The reason the torch is not stopping in Sunderland is 'cos it will be knicked

Saturday 7 May 2011

"Since you asked Invisible Woman, I think about a 36 DD"

Wednesday 4 May 2011

Guido's PMQs Live Highlights: To AV or Not AV Edition

Thanks to Guido once again for hosting today's LiveChat where the windowlickers gather for Wednesday's PMQs.

Quite a boring one today, Cam on good form, RedEd useless and whining and surrounded by the new cast for Lord of the Rings.

#tuscantonyslingualschool

Dorian Smith: bon après-midi, lèche des fenêtres


#tiewatch

Tuscan Tony: Cleggy's tie's a little nasty.,

stormforce999: that is a hideous tie mr straw


#celebwatch

Billy Bowden: Celeb watch : Bin Laden not in chamber.

Billy Bowden: Celeb watch: Barry obama not in the chamber

Billy Bowden: Celeb watch : Peppa the pig is not in the chamber

Dick Scratcher: CELEB WATCH: Geraint Jones (former sports presenter on Harlech TV in gallery)


#latest

Dick Scratcher: LATEST: Al Megrahi’s iPad 2 has just died.


#bestpun

John M Ward: "Mike Gapes" Does he, indeed!


#bestline

Tuscan Tony: Stencil research? No harm in that I'd have thought.


#highlights

Dorian Smith: "Billy Bowden: No cleavage behind red ed" - always a few tits around him though

Charlie: Who is the Hobbit to the left of Ed?

Beware of Geeks: the one on the left should reside under a bridge

Tuscan Tony: To the left of Ed looks like a refugee from a Tim Burton film.

Spank Sinatra: She's on day release from Rampton

Dorian Smith: Labour Front bench looks like the cast of the new Hobbit film

John M Ward: Who's the female to Ed's left (our right)?

Beware of Geeks: @JW Gimli?

John M Ward: Yvette "Gimli" Cooper. Yes, that works :-)

Tuscan Tony: Not Yvette, surely? Has she been at the cupcakes?

Dick Scratcher: # Elves to the left of me, Leprechauns to the right, stuck in the middle...#

GuidoFawkes: @ns_mehdihasan you are making yourself look more foolish than usual. Almost Gordon Brown like inability to admit you got it wrong.

Beware of Geeks: Where's Gordon? Has he retired to Abbottobad?

Tuscan Tony: Stencil research? No harm in that I'd have thought.

Should Be Working: Ainsworth, how have you got the nerve to show your fungus face?

Beware of Geeks: That's like Gordon asking a question about the country's deficit

Bled White Taxpayer: Ainsworth has no right whatsoever to pretend to be the Forces' friend. Dreadful Min Defence in his time.

Beware of Geeks: Spellman working on a building site today?

Tuscan Tony: Why is she an MP?

John M Ward: TT: probably because they couldn't find a donkey to whom to pin the red rosette last May...

Tuscan Tony: Quite so, John,though the donkey would probably have been more articulate.

Should Be Working: Jack Dromey - get back in the kitchen and make Harriet her tea!

Tuscan Tony: Dromey: The All Woman MP

Dick Scratcher: Mandy likes Fairy Dairyland

Dick Scratcher: Salou has stretching targets

Beware of Geeks: Port Salut!

Tuscan Tony: Saloo, sailors!

John M Ward: Ooh, I like Port Salut! Good point: added to shopping list...

will: Kerry mccarthy got what a rough labour arse

stormforce999: she's a great argument for the burka

I hate Labour: Kerry Macarthy gets more ugly every week.

MrHarryCole: RT @iainmartin1: Don't want to be ungallant, but let's take a moment to consider Caroline Spelman's jacket. It's Guantanamo jumpsuit orange

Beware of Geeks: Mike Gapes: Son of Pickles

Tuscan Tony: MIke Gapes; Goatse man.

Dorian Smith: Gapes seems a stranger to "healthy British food", more KFC

Tuscan Tony: Mike Gapes: the root vegetable des nos jours.

Beware of Geeks: Even Prescotts pies aren't large enough to top the £500 expensive limits

paulwaugh: This is not so much #PMQs as TownhallQs. Shdnt be surprised I guess but make for dreary viewing..

Dorian Smith: Labour councils don't do allotments, they plant money trees

Weybridgeman: I thought old Mikey died years ago - he certainly did politically

Beware of Geeks: Therese Coffee? Black please love

Billy Bowden: Racist geeks!!! :-)

Beware of Geeks: sorry Billy - "I'll have a coffee without milk"

Crying into my milk: scoffey

Tuscan Tony: You need to restrict your lower intestine, love.